The Christian Home
What If Parents, Parent Like Eli???

In I Samuel chapters 1-4 we learn something about a man named Eli. He was high priest and judge of Israel. Eli had two sons who were priests, Hophni and Phinehas. These two were called, “sons of Belial”, because of their sins (ch 2:12). They took their part of sacrificial meat before it was roasted, (I Sam. 2:13-15), they threatened anyone that opposed their error (v.16), caused people to abhor the sacrifices (v.17), committed adultery (v.22), and dishonored their fathers wishes (v.25). Eli's sons were known for their evil so he questioned them and called their deeds evil (v.23). Eli rebuked his sons for their sins and for causing the people to transgress. At this point, many would think that Eli had done all that he could. Could he have done more? Concerning Eli’s parental leadership God said, "...and he restrained them not" (I Sam. 3:13). Eli did tell them of their evil and made it plain that he did not approve, yet that was not good enough to please God, because he still honored his sons above God (2:29). This same type of diluted discipline is causing many homes to crumble today.

There are many children living in rebellion against God and their parents who are accepted and protected by their parents. What is said in their defense? Even some who call themselves Christians say, “...so and so knows I don't approve...”, or “...they are family”, or “...no good would come from disciplining them.” However, let us look at Eli again. His sons knew that he did not approve, but simply expressing his disapproval was not enough. Eli could have, and indeed should have expelled them from their position of power and influence. Instead, he stopped with a mild rebuke and lived with the problem. Being family should not matter either when it comes to discipline. God did not appreciate cheating, adulterous, and disrespectful family members being honored above Him (I Sam. 2:29).

Jesus said in Matt. 10:36-37, “And a man’s foes shall be they of his own household and He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.” If Proverbs 13:24 were obeyed and the rebellious child disciplined, he might be saved. Then, the leaven of sin would be removed from the home (Prov. 10:1). Paul said in Galatians 6:1 that the spiritual are to "restore" those overtaken. Should not this principal also apply to godly parents restoring their children who are overtaken in a fault? Like Hophni and Phinehas, erring children will feel no shame or need to repent as long as their sin is tolerated by their parents. Then they too will lose their souls as these men lost their lives.

Not only is the undisciplined child punished, but so is the one who honors their child above God and His will (1 Sam. 2:27-36). Eli was punished for knowing and not correcting evil to the furthest of his ability and knowledge. In many homes, problems arise and are complicated because they are not dealt with immediately. As long as a sinful situation is allowed to exist, without correction, it grows more complicated and difficult to curtail. Parents need to take heed of Eli's situation; we all need to take heed and act according to the scriptures and not emotion. Let us act before our house is judged forever for the iniquity which we know and restrain not. “When I say unto the wicked, O wicked man, thou shalt surely die; if thou dost not speak to warn the wicked from his way, that wicked man shall die in his iniquity; but his blood will I require at thine hand, Nevertheless, if thou warn the wicked of his way to turn from it; if he do not turn from his way, he shall die in his iniquity; but thou hast delivered thy soul' (Ezek. 33:8-9).

Johnny Oxendine
San Mateo, Ca.